When you are the adult child of an alcoholic or the product of being raised by one, you can't quite put your finger on what's wrong. All you know is you feel ill, inappropriate; like a misfit.
As we age, our ego has never learned to trust this place we call home, and so--ego grows.
This is my first time checking this site out. I am writing about step 12, because I am beginning to work with others on a temporary basis. I have worked the steps with my sponsor and have had a spiritual awakening! I am so grateful for a chance to help others, but I am finding it difficult to keep them on topic. Our program here is very solution-focused and I want to help them learn, but sometimes they only want to go on about their horrible day! I pray for patience sometimes, but I see my higher power has a sense of humor, because lord, do they make me call on my patience!
was given the gift of physical sobriety. I did not have to work for it. I though I was dying; literally. I had been drinking for over thirty years and thought I had liver damage. It turned out to be something else. Not life threatening. But it still scared me straight.
I didn't know I needed to. I was to much making arrangements to make a daily planner. Just so I wouldn't have free time on my hands so when I quit it wouldn't be so hard on me. Then I started to read that fear was a big contributor to forcing people into relapse. And it all made perfect sense to me and as I sat back to listen to my thoughts , I heard myself scared of different things as well. I realized I too was scared of my fear. I feared fear also. And if I didn't face my fear then I was going to have minimal results in effort given.
I was given the gift of abstinence. I say a "gift" because it came about because I was scared. I thought I was dying; literally. I thought I had serious liver damage. I mean, I drank for 30 years. So I stopped. But it turned out to be diverticulitis. Still serious, but not life threatening.
